Things That Really Grind My Geeeeeahs

Today has been a pretty good day thus far. I've got a new blog up and running (boo to the ya), a free new tv is on it's way (Vizio = the shiznit) and, most imporantly, a nice non-cheating Indian grad student gave me a cookie. Yet, even with the great day (or because of???) I've got some things that really grind my geeeeeeahs!

All Grind Rates are rated out of 11...because I said so.

Mondays
Who do you think you are? You just barge in here and screw up my whole weekend by telling me, "Hey, lazy-ass you gotta get back to work". And what do you offer me? From the months of January to May you give me 24, but the last two seasons have sucked so you don't get credit. Then from July to August you'll play Hell's Kitchen (amazing), ok, I'll give you points. During the fall we get a Monday Night Football but it's starts so damn late that the games usually end on Tuesday...you lose points for lateness and sharing. Therefore, Mondays you give one cool service which lasts only 1 hour a day for 1 month a year. Doing the math, that comes out to Mondays contributing something cool for 0.00114% of the year. Even Julio Lugo contributes more...oh snap!
Grinding Rating: 4 e's

FOX Broadcasting
Remember that show called Arrested Development? It was pretty much the greatest thing you ever did and you cancelled it. I watched the ending of the 3rd (and final) season yesterday afternoon and came to a conclusion...you suck! And would it hurt you to get my FOX HD channel to come in better?
Grind Rating: 9 e's

Java Message Passing
You know what you did
Grind Rating: 7 e's

Rochester Institute of Technology's CS Department
Heres a little biographical sketch of two people I know: Johnny Fuckup and Billy Doeswhathessupposedtodo. Johnny and Billy are entered in the Computer Science PhD program up at RIT. They've been there for over a year now and have taken the exact same courses. Given they pass the comprehensive exams they'll have enough credits to earn a Master's Degree of Science. These exams involve a 10 page paper which will showcase your breadth of knowledge in 5 separate disciplines within Computer Science. Out of 30 points Billy scores 27 (the highest of anyone) while Johnny scores only 11 and fails.

POP QUIZ: Which PhD student gets the master's degree?

If you answered Billy Doeswhathessupposedtodo you would be so dead wrong it's not even funny. Apparently written into the degree requirements students who fail the exams are the only ones who will receive a MS degree because they could use it as backup given they never pass the exam. Here's two problems with that:

1. Its the dumbest thing I've ever heard
2. Nope, its just pretty much the dumbest thing I've ever heard

A good friend of mine is in a situation at RIT much like young Billy here. He had been told he could have a teaching assistantship while completing his doctorate, however, the school requires he own a MS degree. Unfortunately for my friend he happens to be really smart and he passed the comprehensive exam and, therefore, isn't eligible to receive a MS degree.

I believe Kevin Federline is currently the dean of students.
Grind Rating: 8 billion e's