Thank You Tom Brady

If you haven't been paying attention to the NFL for the first three weeks of the season (shame!) you're missing out on the New England Patriots steam rolling all those who lay in their path. The Jets (10-6 in 2006), Chargers (14-2 in 2006) and Bills (umm, they're plucky?) have been slaughtered by the Pats 38-14, 38-14 and 38-7, respectively (I sense a treeeeennd). So how are the Patriots exactly making it look this easy?

Tom. Brady.

For years Tom Tom has been a great QB, winning 3 Super Bowls and quietly being the second best passer in the game (I hate you but, god-dammit, I respect you Peyton Manning) despite having some of the most pathetic offensive talent. The first two championships had a RB (Antwain Smith) who averaged 3 yrd/carry...I could fall farther! And the WR corps was downright awful (minus Troy Brown...he's gritty) and their success was mainly a product of Brady's ability to make people around him better (hey, Deion Branch, how's life with Matt Hasselbeck?). This season that all changed with the additions of Wes "Troy Brown 10 yrs ago but way faster" Welker, Donte "20 yard/catch" Stallworth and, most importantly, Randy "Yep, I'm that good" Moss. The Patriots offense these days is just downright unfair. Play physical at the line and Moss runs by everyone (5 TDs in 3 games). Playing cover 2 and doubling Moss leaves Welker alone in the middle for shenanigans. How about a nickel set? Ok, how about big 'ol Ben Watson demoralizing your linebackers? Oh, and Laurence Maroney is averages about 5 yrd/carry just in case Brady's arm falls off. So now, equipped with the weapons he's always dreamed about, Tom Brady is poised for one of the greatest seasons by a QB ever (80% CMP%, 141.8 rating, 10 TD, 1INT through Week 3) and saving millions of lives in the process.

That's right. Tom Brady is saving Red Sox Nation one completion at a time.

The Patriots romp through the first three weeks of the NFL season has diverted our attention here in New England from THE BIGGEST COLLAPSE IN SPORTS HISTORY (ok, I'm being a little overdramatic). In June the Red Sox held a double-digit lead over the Yankees. Everyone proclaimed the division race was over. The Yankees would have to play over .600 ball and the Sox (owners of the best record in baseball) would have to be a .500 team for the remainder of the season. Impossible we all said.

Guess what...it happened.

The Sox currently stand 1.5 games up on the Yankees and are whimpering to the finish line. Manny, Ortiz and Youkilis are all hurt, JD Drew is still the team (how scared are you of Jacoby Ellsbury Mr. Drew?), Wakefield keeps forgetting games aren't batting practice and, for the love of God, will someone please shoot Eric Gagne right in his stupid goggles?!?!? Yet, I remain calm (ok, except for that last comment...but he's makes me sooo angry). Why? Because on Sunday afternoons this fall I've been swept away to a fantasy land filled with sugar plumbs, touchdowns and goody-gum-football drops. As long as Tom Tom keeps throwing touchdowns to Randy Moss Red Sox nation will steer clear of the proverbial ledge. Therefore, as a member of Red Sox Nation I'd like to extend my thanks.

Thank you Tom Brady for being the savior* of Red Sox Nation.

* Red Sox Nation reserves all rights to mercilessly boo Tom Brady, the New England Patriots and any associate of the two at any hint they do not continue their current pace of success, at which point we will claim we "saw this coming".